TV Reviews for the Week of Dec. 7, 2008 Pt. 1

"Bart, stop Milhousing your sister."

Lisa-centric episodes are pretty boring and predictable, where Homer will eventually, whether by accident or on purpose, will save the day and be his daughter’s hero.

"Oh, you know I’ve always wanted to live in the city and pretend I was poor."

Wow. She started showing quickly. It almost seemed like the wedding and the baby softened up Dick a little, but that still doesn’t mean what’s-his-name can’t act like an ass a little.

"Why do I feel like I’m the one who just got the prostate exam?"

Good for Leonard, gettin’ his swerve on. And the trick his lady doc pulled on Sheldon to get him to shut up? Priceless. I wonder how long they can keep doing that before he figures out that nothing is actually wrong with him. He strikes me as a hypochondriac, so I bet it would work a number of times.

"Go ahead and do the typey type."

It was nice to see a bit of Sarah’s past, and who doesn’t like watching Jack Cole? Will Sarah and Chuck finally get together (for real this time) at all this season?

"Okay, it’s clobberin’ time."

Will Sasso was one of the only actors I consistently enjoyed on Mad TV, so it was nice to see him here. I wouldn’t mind seeing him as a recurring character. He seems to be a fun, quirky character.

"No urinating in the stairwell. That’s the golden rule."

Okay, now I think they’ve done one switcheroo too many. So the company is helping save Michael? And it looks like someone, I couldn’t tell who but it looked like a woman’s hand and not the General, actually cared for him. Is their mother still alive? The doctor said he had seen Michael’s condition only once before. Could it have been his mother? After being a dick for two seasons, Alex got shit on a lot this season, and I felt sorry for him when he realized he wasn’t going to meeting with the Attorney General. I hope things turn out well for him in the end. Right now I don’t give a crap about Don or what’s-her-name, and really, T-Bag got what he deserved. With Michael out of the picture for a bit, it’ll be interesting to see how Linc, Sarah and what’s-his-name (I’m blanking on names lately) will get Cilla (sp?) back.

"Cake?"

I’m a bit disappointed that Elle is dead, but only a bit. I like Sylar as a villain, I just hope he finally stays that way. It’s like they went all this way just to get back to the beginning. And I thought it was odd that nobody heard...Sam?...scream when Sylar cut her open, because three people were apparently right outside the door. Hiro’s scene with his mother was pretty touching, the stuff with Claire, not so much. She already had a good home life and both parents, hell, all four parents, are still alive. Then Arthur had to go and steal the last gift Hiro’s mother gave him. When Arthur telekinetically threw Hiro off of the building, it looked like he was tossed pretty damn far. Either that flag pole was really long, or he was just tossed off the side rather than thrown. At least Sylar is up to his old tricks again.

Sometimes I wonder if criminals or wannabe criminals ever try to use any of the ideas on any of these crime shows? Is there really a drug out there that bends the human will and steals memory? I guess only Gob Bluth knows the answer to that. Olivia has had it rough lately. At least the scumbag was put away. Happy days all around.

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Listening to: Beck - Heaven Hammer (Missing)
via FoxyTunes

TV Reviews for the Week of Nov. 23, 2008 Pt. 1

Jack Bauer is back! Yeah!!!!!! This is one of the most unrealistic and ridiculous shows that has been on TV in the last, what, 6 years? But damn, the action, the suspense, the backstabbing…it’s riveting. This was a very good teaser for the new season in January. It was very much a stand-alone story, where you didn’t have to know anything about Jack or his past. But it’s very good at making you want to come back in January to see how it ends up. What’s going to happen to Jack? What’s going to happen with the coup and who are the Americans that are funding it? Why did the outgoing President not consult with the President Elect since everything transpired within hours of her inauguration? These are the questions that’ll bring me back in January. These and the fact that Jack kicks much ass: lobbing dynamite, stabbing people, withstanding torture and red-hot machetes, and killing people with one leg.

So now Riley is from the future, too? Damn, John just can’t catch a break. I think having Cromartie as the mouthpiece for John Henry is a good idea. That’ll end up creeping people out.

Who knew transporting a bride to a wedding could be so hazardous? That part of the episode was good, but it seemed to be going through the motions. The meat of the show was actually what was going on back home. Bob and Kim are working together to see what’s going on with Kim’s employer. He’s now got Bob working for him, and he’s trying to get into Kim’s pants. Oh, and his last nanny just turned up dead. Hmm.

“I’m so excited right now that I’m sporting a yule log.”

I’m not much of a Christmas special kind of guy, but I’m very much a Stephen Colbert kind of guy, so this is a no-brainer for me. The one thing I’m not enjoying is the laugh track. I’m actually just into this for Stephen and his persona’s un-PC views. I can actually do without the guests (well, Jon Stewart can stay) and musical numbers. Okay, Willie Nelson as a wise man with the gift of pot was pretty funny, and the song was pretty damn good. And the Jon Stewart bit, and John Legend’s nutmeg. Maybe I dismissed the songs too quickly. I think I’m going to have to get the soundtrack for this. This version of Peace, Love and Understanding probably tops A Perfect Circle’s version as my favorite.

Yet another excellent Sheldon episode. I actually expected him to ruin Leonard’s relationship, but kudos to Sheldon. And I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I’m glad they quickly dropped the Leonard/Penny thing. It’s actually probably better for the show that they went and got through it early on so it wouldn’t rear up and destroy the show during later seasons.

“You already broke my heart. Is it necessary for you to shoot it, too?”

Converse to the Leonard/Penny situation in Big Bang Theory, I really want Chuck and Sarah to end up together. You know what they say, “The family that spies together, stays together,” or something like that. I will miss seeing Jordana Brewster, though. I’m sure she’ll rear her gorgeous head again.

This was probably the funniest episode of the season so far. I just wish I had an opportunity to use the naked man. Hell, I guess if Lily can use it, so can I.

This season may actually surpass the first season in its greatness. Of course, it doesn’t take much to top the crap that they gave us last year. Every time there has been a double-cross or a new trick pulled out of a random hat, it’s made perfect sense. ALL the guys in the vault with Scilla (sp?) when it only looks like Michael is there. Agent Self showing his true colors. That lady turning out to be that guy’s daughter (yeah, so I don’t know EVERYONE’S name). Good acting, good stories, good twists…I’m looking forward to what is coming next for our heroes.

Good but average episode. Mohinder and his cocoon was disgusting. I’m interested in seeing how everyone gets their powers back, whether it’s natural or if it’s Mohinder.

Oh, that’s awesome. I always wondered how you set a swimming pool on fire. And who didn’t see the confrontation with the preacher coming (pun slightly intended)? I was surprised that they went and got the wedding finished this episode. It makes me wonder if there are any other episodes left, because they seemed to gloss over a lot of possible misadventures at the reception.

“I just got an erection.”

Normally I’d rail on a show using a clever device more than once within months of each other, especially when it’s the first season for the show. But they used the memory tank thingy differently this time with different results. Nice. And once again I’m floored by Walter and his social ignorance. As for the science, well, Eleventh Hour used the hallucinogenic frog trick earlier…but not near as well.

Andre 3000 is a good actor. Too bad we won’t get more of him against Aceveda. From the beginning of this episode I had this horrible thought of Shane killing his wife, killing his kid, then killing himself. His frame of mind, the choices he has left, I have no doubt that he would do it. As I type this I’m only an hour into the episode with 45 minutes left. I’d like to think I was wrong, but I don’t think it’s going to go that way. Shit. And it looks like I wasn’t wrong. Dammit. But I couldn’t see any other way out of it. After Vic told him he and Ronnie had immunity, it was all over. I just hope Vic doesn’t take care of the Ronnie situation by taking him out. I know Vic is the “hero” of this story, but I hope he doesn’t get off scott free. His family is gone, so that’s one thing, but Shane was right…he’s not the high and mighty family man that he claims to be. Oh holy crap Vic is in Hell. A cubicle, a desk, a suit, no weapon, no family, no friends, no contacts…Shane’s option may look pretty viable right now. At the end, you could see him weighing all of his options until it hit him…this is the best it will get for him.

Fuck the Sopranos. There, I said it. Fuck the Sopranos. You want a superb drama with a bad guy at the center, something that hits every episode with top-notch acting, great stories, and believable characters, start renting (or heck, it’ll be worth your money to buy them) each and every season of The Shield until you’re done watching it. Then go back and watch it again, because Tony Soprano ain’t got shit on Vic Mackey, and Christopher Montisani (sp?) ain’t got shit on Shane Vandrel. I only wish I could watch this for the first time again. It was so good that I want to get amnesia, forget I ever saw it, then watch the whole damn thing all over again. Fuck the Sopranos.

This may sound mean, but this is the best I’ve ever seen Clea Duvall look. She actually looks pretty, rather than mannish in Heroes, The Faculty or Buffy the Vampire Slayer. This episode was a bit tricksy. One murder leads to another one that happened decades ago. It was some good writing that, at the end, paralleled the older woman with Clea’s character. Judith Light scares me. She needs to eat a burger or something.

TV Reviews for the Viewing Week of Nov. 16, 2008 Pt. 1

"Will and shorts, two things I’m no longer allowed to change by myself."

Homer’s new job was a lot funnier than Lisa’s crossword addiction. Homer or Ralph, those are the two characters that’ll make an episode for me. Doesn’t matter if they’re the focus of the episode or just show up to make a couple of quips.

Hmm, a couple of call-backs early on. You’ve got Cleveland in his bathtub falling out of his house, and you’ve got Frank Sinatra, Jr. singing with Brian. Okay, if you can find it, it’s probably on YouTube, that news special that Stewie did is actually based on an actual news feature. Otherwise it was a pretty lackluster episode. Maybe it’s just my mindset lately, but it’s taking a lot to impress me.

Good for Mac, but I’m wondering what will end up happening to Col. Ryan. Will he stay as their commanding officer? If not, I would hope they would find a role for him in some capacity. Robert Patrick is a good actor.

Ah, poor Wolowitz. Always unlucky in love. But good for Leonard. And seriously, why didn’t someone just pick something that would beat Spock?

Angie made a comment while walking through the room, and it was so obvious, yet I hadn’t seen it. It’s a weekly dose of Meet the Parents/Fokkers. Except this guy is more likeable than Ben Stiller. Actually, all the actors are more likeable than their movie counterparts.

Of course. Something was going right for Chuck, so there had to be something wrong about it. I guess we won’t be seeing as much of Jordana Brewster as I was hoping we would...although we saw a decent amount of her toward the end of the episode. Same with oh my God I have forgotten the blonde’s name. Sarah, that’s her. Yeah, shower scene. Not all that sexy, but still.

Hmm, not a bad episode, but not all that great. I do need to start implementing conference calls at the office. I just don’t think my company is big enough or I’m important enough to actually get away with it, though. I forgot how Barney and Ted met. Would anybody believe that they’re best friends rather than Ted and Marshall?

On the surface, I am really enjoying this season. But underneath, fundamentally, there are flaws. Now, I don’t know if this is because it’s trying to cram in things that were supposed to happen last season but didn’t because of the strike, or if the writers are just trying to do too much, or if the writers are just sloppy. Gabriel and Elle were cured of their bat-shit craziness way too easily. I mean, it’s good that those two crazy kids (pun not intended, but enjoyed by the writer nonetheless) found each other and are able to know love and blah blah blah, but really, they were cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs, and one bowl doesn’t magically cure that. I’m very excited about next week. Seth Green shows up, and it’s a shame that there’s been too little of Seth Green on TV.

Watching Gretchen and the General together seriously nauseates me. The last half of the episode was pretty intense. The fact that there was no dialogue and no sound other than some mood music really ramped up the tension. You knew something bad was going to happen, but Sucre’s slip-up still got to me.

Well, if I’ve heard correctly, this show has been cancelled. I would have thought it would have at least gotten a full season, what with Slater’s star power. And of course after the cancellation notice, we get more into a conspiracy against Edward/Henry, going back to the murder of his parents by the KGB.

"I guess that depends on if he has succeeded in killing himself yet."

Another excellent episode with a brief look into Walter’s time at the institution. It seems as if there is something hinky going on with Walter’s former doctor. He was too eager to keep him locked up, and not just because he thinks Walter isn’t fit for human interaction.

Wow. Now that’s an inventive way to kill people. I personally enjoyed the, how many was it? Five? Five hyenas that killed the rapper. Who knew that animal smuggling was such a high-risk, high-dollar enterprise. And all that work just to teach Stabler the importance of family.

"How much memory does that thing got?"

The look on Blondie’s face when Vic tells her about killing Terry and then about reselling confiscated drugs, oh my God that was priceless. And her boss in the back room? The realization that Vic was a master criminal with a badge? Fuckin’...priceless. Oh, and then there are Claudette and Dutch when they hear that Vic has full immunity on everything he confesses to. It’s too bad about Ronnie, though. He’s followed Vic through everything, even after getting his face burned. And as things seem to have all worked out in Vic’s favor, everything has gone to shit for Shane.

Are John and Cameron going to hook up? That would be weird. Would the Terminators make themselves anatomically correct? Is it just some inherent flaw in robots that they always want to be human? Considering what John grows up to do, it would be incredibly kinky and messed up if he hooked up with a Terminator. I always enjoy seeing Buffy alums working, even though they usually don’t get major parts.

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Listening to: Free - All Right Now
via FoxyTunes

TV Reviews for the Viewing Week of Nov. 9, 2008 Pt. 2

"We’re gonna need a fire extinguisher, and maybe some sort of trauma counselor."

My wife really wants Bones and Booth to end up together. No, I think that would be weird. I think they have a really close brother/sister bond. Yes, there is love there, but not THAT kind of love. When Bones found out that Booth had been bailing his little brother out of trouble for years at the cost of his own success, you could see the hurt and the caring she feels for him. And I’d also like to give some kudos to David Boreanez. His acting has improved by leaps and bounds since his days as Angel.

"He may need to know karate."

Just a so-so episode. The best part was Matthew hitting on the girl in Ritchie’s class.

"Dude, you can’t get married without strippers. It’s in the Bible, I think."

Once again, I’ve missed the previous episode. It’s difficult when I’m supposed to be watching so much stuff at a certain time. Poor Sam. Even when some goes his way (his fiancé telling him why she loves him and wants to marry him), he still ends up screwing up.

Looks like I missed another one of these, too. Okay, so Terminator guy held Sarah by the neck with one hand and pointed a gun at her head with the other. Why? He could just crush her throat, or put a fist through her skull, or even just a robotic finger. I tend to like stories like this, where a short amount of time is the main story, but we get to see each angle of the story by following each character separately. I think it’s why I liked Starman so much. James Robinson did this a lot over his 80-issue run. I still marvel at the lack of a targeting program in this highly sophisticated robot. And what the hell kind of bullets were they using on Cromartie? I thought conventional weaponry couldn’t hurt a Terminator. And I’ve got one thing to say to Fox.com regarding the commercials played during their on-demand episodes: don’t show the same commercial throughout a single program. I get it. Jack Bauer will be returning in a 2-hour 24 event! I’ve got my DVR set. Is nothing else noteworthy happening in the next week?

"Oh God, please don’t let it be an STD. I’ve made it to almost 40."

Hmm, I’m wondering if I should use this show as a blueprint for when Angie finally gets fed up with me and divorces me. The lesson learned this week? Don’t take anyone to...hmm, I guess Angie and I don’t have an "our" restaurant.

"If you run, you’ll only die tired."

Not the best episode, I thought. The kid who was living in the mall with his sister, I don’t like him. He had a recurring role on CSI: NY, and I’ve seen him pop up here and there, and I don’t think he’s all that great. I was surprised that Reese met with the new Captain for dinner. That…that relationship would just confuse me. And I don’t think Cruz’s renewed relationship with his wife is going to end well. Somebody’s going to wind up getting hurt.

Blah. It’s official, I’m bored with this show.

The best part of the episode was actually hearing James Marsters voice at the end. He was the best thing that ever happened to the show, and he was short-lived. I was hoping this Chloe storyline would see him brought back, but I’ll take a voice if that’s all we’re getting. I’m pretty excited about next week’s episode. It looks like we’re finally going to see Doomsday, and from what I saw in the previews, he looks pretty good. And regardless of his origin or initial appearance, the writers seem be staying true to his powers and abilities, so that’s good.

This was a really good Reid (there Angie, happy?) episode...well, not so much for him, I guess. We finally see Reid’s father for the first time, it’s just too bad that Reid thinks he sexually assaulted then killed a 6-year-old boy. This is obviously some rough stuff for Reid to go through, and he ends up running the gamut of emotions before everything is wrapped up nice and neat and everyone makes it back to D.C. in time for Reid to become godfather of JJ’s new baby boy.

This episode really brought up Andy’s stock. He went from the angry Cornell suck-up to the perpetual wingman. And you can’t help but feel sorry for him in his relationship with
Angela. Even if she weren’t cheating on him, it’s Angela. I agree with Oscar, "What do you see in her?"

Ooh, that ATF bitch is, well, a bitch. And there is no way Opie is getting out of this predicament alive. Poor Opie.

"Don’t you recognize me? Oh, I forgot, I’m wearing a pediatrician."

Well now Sam. There seems to be a bit of slap and tickle, a little pinch and squeal between Sam and his demon girlfriend. After the guys find a girl who can listen to the angels, Ruby runs off with her while the boys fight a demon. Later, while searching for Ruby, Sam tells Dean how they got together. After storytime, the boys meet back up with Ruby and Anna, only to be told by Castiel that Anna has to die. Honestly, I can see his way of thinking. Dean even said it: she’s a direct line to the enemy’s plans. It would just be easier for the angels to get rid of her and have that loose end taken care of. The needs of the many and all that nonsense.

"We all want what’s best for Jack. So let’s just have this three-way."

Night Court! Harry, Christine and Mac! Jennifer Aniston may not have been the most talented friend, but she was definitely the hottest. But yeah, she’s not that great of an actress. I liked watching her in this episode, but she just annoyed me. As always, Kenneth and Tracy were great.

"Hold still. You can’t run from the kindness of strangers."

So it’s not so much an Extreme Makover: Home Edition as it is Extreme Makeover: Hate Crime. I never realized that Frank was such a master manipulator. Ah, he knew the whole time that it was going to fail, big time. At least they were able to get the taco bed done...sort of.

Well, this show got an extra, what, five extra episodes for the season? Eh, I’m bored with this one, too. I can’t waste an hour just for the few minutes when something from the future pops up.

First pre-credits impressions? Too Silver Agey. As much of a fan I am of the Bruce Timm Batman series, I don’t think I’ll find anything to match up to it. Plus, Dietrich Bader is the voice of Batman. I’ll never be able to take him seriously as anything but a goofball. Post-credit, it’s still very Silver Agey, but that makes it weird since it’s got the latest Blue Beetle in it. I’m sorry, I just can’t watch it any more. It’s too childish, even for me. Now, if I were a fan of Silver Age DC comics, this cartoon would be awesome. But I’m not, and it isn’t. Put The Batman back on CW on Saturday mornings and I’ll watch that...or my Batman: The Animated Series collection.

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Listening to: Ambulance LTD - Anecdote
via FoxyTunes